I live in Minnesota 
*begins run for the hills*
Which theater did you go to? I work at one in Eagan MN south of the cities
Went to the eden prairie theater. DAAAAAAAAMN y'all got some nice theaters! Holy crap, there was an automated machine where we stuck in our credit card and out popped the ticket, then at the concession stand they sold shit like PIZZA, HOTDOGS, PRETZELS, etc., and a fucking butter dispenser where we could put on our own butter instead of having some 500 pound guy dump 16 pounds of grease all over our stuff. The popcorn was also of a much higher quality than madison popcorn, for real. It was CRUNCHY and not chewy!
The lady at the concession stand also has two of the plumpest and well shaped breasts Ive ever seen. My wife and I both took notice of that and I almost didn't feel the slap my wife gave me upon musing on the size and coloration of said concession stand worker's nipples which clearly stood out against the thin, transparent white shirt she was wearing. With no bra I might add.
you could also buy candy out of a machine, ice cream bars out of a machine and the seats......I swear if I had a wrench with me I would have stolen at least three of the uberly comfortable seats in that theater.
....It's too bad the movie sucked fucking goat balls!!!!!!!! DO NOT SEE HOUSE OF 1000 CORPSES! It's a cheesy texas chainsaw massacre ripoff with some of the ugliest (ugly in a bad way) visuals. The only good part was the blond lady's (her name was baby I believe) tight asscrack and pert bitties. Other than that, the movie really really really really really sucked ass. Oh, and the clown was relatively amusing.
The thinnest plot ever, almost no real gore (most of it got cut out to garner its R rating), VEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEERY predictable ending. I swear to god, half of the audience said "thank god" when it was over. I'm not even kidding about that part. The last hour was spent hoping the movie would end soon. Several times throughout the movie, we started to get up to walk out, but the stiff erection I had for the blond chick and the hopes that the movie would soon end were the only things that made us sit back down.
But I'd say about 20% of the other theatre patrons weren't as patient (or aroused) and I saw them get up and leave in droves within the first hour of the movie.
To be perfectly honest, the ONLY people that have given this a good review are people that have either seen the uncut version, or haven't seen the movie at all and are just really big rob zombie fans.
This was the cinematic equivalent of wrapping your buttcheeks around a 20 foot long razorblade and sliding into a pool of iodine, where a band of elves are waiting to clamp jumper cables and a tractor battery to your nipples while someone pours honey on your nuts and dumps an army of red ants on the honey.
Yes, it was that bad. And this is coming from someone that's seen such classics as "redneck zombies", "rabid granny" and "alien 3". I'd rather watch a molly ringwald movie (and not the good one where she showed her boobies) than suffer through that steaming pile of crap again.
My review is: Three thumbs down (and if you have to ask what the third thumb is, then you really don't know me too well)
When the blond girl is onscreen: Two thumbs down, one thumb standing straight up, making something reminiscent of a tent in my pants
